Let's Catch Up

I have experienced stress, like all the stress, this year. In the past 12 months I have experienced more stress than I had any idea was possible.

People have it worse. My story isn't like that, and I don't share it to compare. I share it because I like to write about things in my life and sometimes I think people can relate.

I've stressed about everything and nothing. I have contemplated everything and wanted to think of nothing.

I've had ferocious nightmares about things that I didn't know tormented me so heavily. I have had dreams of flying, like when I was a child, and woken up feeling like I'm floating. I have woken my husband up laughing hysterically and slapping him too. Yes, husband, I got married. I stressed about the wedding, but I dreamed about the marriage.

I've stressed about my health, my weight, my aging. I've happily accepted my experiences, my wisdom and my laugh lines.

I've let go of unhealthy relationships, obstacles and dependencies. I've embraced the validity of longevity, patience and the humor in it all.

I've leaned in, I've mellowed out, I've wondered about all of it.

I have made the decision to choose my circumstance. I've enclosed my circle of trust and embraced my responsibility in it.

I lost a mountain of stress in one area only to gain worry in another.

I've fallen more in love.

I've quietly said farewell.

I've been angry and disappointed and I've found light and comfort.

I've been okay. I've been better than okay. I'll be continuing to grow in the good ways, explore in the scary ways, and triumph in the important ways.

In summary, I've been living that 44 year old life.

Writing. Discovering. Exploring. Loving. Wifing. Dog-moming. Friending. Sistering. Daughtering. Aunting. Laughing.